These last few years I have become more and more saddened by the fact that people with differing opinions do not talk WITH each but more likely, talk AT each other. Including me. I realized I was not as good a listener as I thought I was and that perhaps the challenge is not that we have differing opinions but more to the point, we don't listen to each other anymore. And as modern life gets ever busier and more complicated, we are less in tune with our neighbors and communities.

And so it was a gift to discover My Neighbor's Voice this past year and learn about myself and my neighbors in a genial and generous way.

My Neighbor’s Voice is the brainchild of founders Victoria Chance and Mary Anne Inglis, My Neighbor’s Voice aims to create structure for neighbors or acquaintances or share a meal, talk and most importantly listen to one another. I was lucky enough to attend one of these meals in Traveler's Rest, Georgia a few months ago. I was so inspired that I decided to host two dinners a few months ago with one of the founder's Victoria Chance.

“We practice listening as a generous and powerful act to diminish fear and confusion and come away with a more respectful understanding of our neighbors.” -Victoria

It was a rewarding experience from beginning to end. My Neighbor’s Voice offers hosts moderation material, opening scripts and support to facilitate respectful and expansive discussion over a meal or cup of tea. However, it was such a rewarding experience that I did not take a single photo. Perhaps in the era of ubiquitous social media, this is the best testament I could give to the power of My Neighbor’s Voice.

To learn more about this important and thoughtful organization; and to consider hosting your own event, follow their link here!

While working on this blog, I did think of how important dinner parties have been throughout the course of human history. From the lavish Black and White Ball hosted by Truman Capote to the more altruistic gatherings of Maya Angelou, these events have undoubtedly made a lasting impact on culture, politics, region and even geography. Here are some of my favorite famous dinner parties!

Truman Capote’s Black and White Ball

Truman Capote is a complicated and sometimes deeply unlikable figure in American Literature. That being said Capote’s Black and White Ball hosted in 1966 for 540 guests. Guests were invited to a “little masked ball for Kay Graham and all of my friends,” and the New York Times called it “the best party ever” on it’s 50 year anniversary in 2016.

Cleopatra’s Dinner

Going further back still, Cleopatra was famous for her wit, charm and charisma. She loved hosting and entertaining, mixing business and influence into the social gatherings. Perhaps her most famous party was thrown for her lover Mark Anthony, and the two dined on wild boar, honey, figs and in an especially eccentric turn a beverage made from Cleopatra’s dissolved pearl earring and vinegar.

The Dinner Table Bargain

Thanks to the runaway Broadway hit, Hamilton, many people have heard this next story already. Coined “The Dinner Table Bargain” in June of 1790 Alexander Hamilton, Thomas Jefferson and James Madison had dinner together. Although the legend claims that it was a secretive meeting, behind closed doors, the reality was much more bureaucratic. Votes, floor arguments and amendments had already been held previous to June 20th, and Madison did have the votes needed to move the U.S. Capital from New York to DC.

Hamilton to his credit did help smooth over some of the objections and rallied up the votes, as a direct result of the June 20th dinner, redefining and possibly saving our young republic.

The Origin of The Atlantic

In 1857, publisher Moses Phillips held a dinner party to pitch the idea for The Atlantic (originally The Atlantic Monthly) to some leading literary heavyweights.

In a letter to his niece, Moses Phillips said of the event:

“I must tell you about a little dinner-party I gave about two weeks ago. It would be proper, perhaps, to state that the origin of it was a desire to confer with my literary friends on a somewhat extensive literary project, the particulars of which I shall reserve till you come. But to the party: My invitations included only R.W. Emerson, H.W. Longfellow, J.K. Lowell, Mr. Motley (the ‘Dutch Republic’ man), O.W. Holmes, Mr. Cabot, and Mr. Underwood, our literary man. Imagine your uncle as the head of such a table, with such guests. The above named were the only ones invited, and they were all present. We sat down at three P.M., and rose at eight.”

Although not mentioned in his letter, Phillips did indeed share the idea and creation of a new literary magazine, called The Atlantic Monthly, now referred to as simply, The Atlantic.

Maya Angelou and I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

On her 40th birthday, James Baldwin took Maya Angelou to a dinner party hosted at the Manhattan apartment of Judy Feiffer.

“To hearten Ms. Angelou [after the death of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. on her 40th birthday], her friend James Baldwin took her to dinner at [Judy Feiffer’s] Manhattan apartment. There, she entranced the host couple, the novelist Philip Roth, and the other guests with her stories, many of them harrowing, of growing up in the segregated South, being raped by her mother’s boyfriend and, after being shuttled among relatives, her pervasive sense of displacement, which, for a black girl, she recalled, was “the rust on the razor that threatens the throat.”

“Her stories were fascinating, and Angelou was intoxicatingly charismatic and dynamic in the telling of them,” Kate Feiffer said this week. “My mother urged her to write a memoir.”

Ms. Angelou demurred, but Judy Feiffer introduced her to Robert Loomis, an editor at Random House. She resisted his entreaties, too. But, Ms. Angelou recalled at a tribute to Mr. Loomis in 2007 that the editor shrewdly tried another gambit. It was too challenging for Ms. Angelou to resist.

“It’s just as well, because to write an autobiography as literature is just impossible,” Mr. Loomis said. To which Ms. Angelou replied gamely, “I will try.”

Addendum